Unique Funny SMS in Urdu, Hindi and English

Archive for the ‘Love Shairy’ Category

Yoga teacher to a woman: Has yoga any effect over your husband’s drinking habit?

Woman: Yes, an amazing funny effect! Now he drinks the whole bottle standing upside down over his head.

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Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya?

Banta: Maine kaha salon Ek-Ek karke aao.
Santa: Phir?

Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta!

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Pathan’s Friend: What is call girl?

Pathan: Khocha jab ap kisi ko call karta hai, Tab ek larki call per bolti hai k aap ka blnce na kafi hai, us ko call girl bolte hain.

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SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY
Dont get confused, Aray Baba SORRY means:

S->Some,
O->One Is,
R->Really,
R->Remembering
Y->You..

Have A wonderful day!

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Dard dene waale bahut milte hai,
Magar dard lene waale kam milte hai,
Nazuk waqt me hume zarur yaad karna,
Kyuki zindagi me chahne waale bahut kam milte hai.

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I can’t find a reason why Life Introduced Me to You..

But that’s not the question.

Question is: How life knew that I needed a lovely one like you???

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Yaaden Aansu hoti to chalak jati,
Yaaden likhawat hoti to padhi jati,
Yaaden to zindgi me basa wo ehsas hai,
Jo lakh kosiso ke baad bhi lafzo me nahi simat pati..

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1 Bacha ek ghar ki bell bajane ki koshish kr raha tha:

1 Baba G ne dekha to us k pas ja k Bell beja di or pocha beta or koi kam ho to btao.

Bacha: Baba nass hun.

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Inspector to Banta: Phaansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai?

Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..

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BOY 2 girl: Tu hi to Jannat meri,
Tu hi mera junon or kuach na janu me,
Bas itna hi janu,
Tujme RAB dikhta hai YARA me kya kru.

Girl: Mattha tek or Dafaa ho.

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Aap Humko Achy lagty Ho,
Door jaty ho jitna utna Dil k Qareeb lagty ho,
Meri Qismat main tum nahi lekin,
Phir bhi mujhko Apna Naseeb Kyon Lagty ho?

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Koi Pal Bina Tumhary,
Bhala Kese Beet Jaye.

Mere Paas tum nahi ho,
Meri Yaad k nagar Main.

Mere Khuab k Safar main,
Meri Soch ki Tahon Main,

Meri aankh k Bhanwar main
Bas Aarzu Tumhari,

Is Aarzu se aagy,
Koi Raasta Nahi hai,

Tumhain Kis Qadar hai Chaha
Ye Tumhain Pata nahi Hai.

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Aik sardar Europe gaya wahan us ko police ne roka aur investigation start kar di..

Sardar ko English nai aati thi..

Us ne Sick Leave ki Application suna di.

Police ne use Pagal samajh k chor dia..

Wife: Wah sardar jee tusi te great o.

Sardar: O A tey kuch vi nai Hale te may Thirsty Crow nai sunai..

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Aaj ksi ne mjhe phon kya
Aur
AaP k barey me kuch btya
Me us ka naam to nhi bta skta
Per
Wo aap k barey me keh raha tha k aap

* some text missing *

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Loveliest SMS Collection

45 Saal Ka Aadmi Larki Dekhny Gaya!

Larki Ki Maa Dekh K Behosh Ho Gai
Jab
Hosh Aaya
Waja Poochi?
Tou Boli 25 Saal Pehle
Ye Mujhy B Dekhny Aaya Tha… =P šŸ˜‰

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If My T0mOr0w Never C0ms,
Im S0ry,
F0r Al The Mean Thngs I Might Hav Said..
Im S0ry,
F0r Al The Thngs I Did 0r Didnt D0..
Im S0ry,
If I Ever Ign0red U..
Im S0ry,
If I Ever Made U Feel Bad 0r Put U D0wn..
Im S0ry,
If I Ever Th0t I Was Bigger 0r Better Than U..
Im S0ry,
F0r Everything Wr0ng I’ve Ever D0ne..
Im Writing This Bec0z Wat If My T0m0r0w Never C0mes?
Wat If I Never Get A Chance T0 Say Gudbye Or Wat If I Never Get To Say SoRy!
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Gairon Se Manga To Zillat Mli

ALLAH Se Manga To Izzat Mli

Aye Mangne Wale Mang Usi Se Jo Deta Hai Kushi Se

Or

Kehta Nhi Ksi Se…

Subha Bakhair
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Ibtidaay Ishq Hai Rota Hai Kya…

“Zara Ghor Se Dekh Ye Tera Khota Hai Kia?

(\./)
/.”.) “^—-;”;_
\,,/”( , , )
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Desk Pe Kisi Class Ki Tanha,

Student Tha Koi Udas Betha,
Kehta Tha Exam Sir Pe Aye,
Khelny Kodny Mai Saal Guzara,
Sun K Student Ki Ye Baat,Pharra Koi Pas Hi Se Bola,
Hazir Hu Madad Ko Dil-O-Jan Se,
Pharra Hu Agarchy Mai Zara Sa,
Hain Student Wohi Jahan Mai Ache,
Hoty Hain Jo Pas Pharron Se..
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Baaten Sunte Raho
Baaten Karte Raho
Dil Ki Awaz Ko Ab Dabana Nahi Baaten Sunte Raho Baaten Karte Raho Dil May Jo Baat Hai Wo Chupana Nahi

Aate Jate Hue
Maine Dekha Use
Bola Dil Ab Nigahen Hatana Nahi

Subho Se Sham Phir
Raat Dhalti Gai
Roshni Chehre Ki Us K Her Su Rahi
Baaten Sunte Raho Baaten Karte Raho
Dil May Jo Baat Hai Wo Chupana Nahi

Naam Likhta Raha Or Chupata Raha Keh Saka Usko Dil Ka Fasana Nahi Ek Din Mil Gaya Koi Apna Usay Kar Gai Bheer May Kaise Tanha Mujhe Tab Laga Yun Mujhe Mere Ghar May Usay Chand Bun Kar Kabhi Jagmagana Nahi

Main To Mayoos Tha
Surmai Sham May
Zindagi Bhejdi Usne Pygham May

Mil Gai Wo Mujhe
Keh Diya Ye Use Aagaye Hoto Ab Duur Jana Nahi
Baaten Sunte Raho
Baaten Karte Raho
Dil May Jo Baat Hai Wo Chupana Nahi…!
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Budha : Beti Tumhara Nahna Muna Bhai Har Waqt Rota Kyon Rehta Ha…?

Beti : Ap K Ball Na Ho Ap K Dant Na Ho Ap Chal Phir Na Sakien Bat Cheet Bi Na Kr Sakien Tou Ap Kiya Roye Ge Nahe.
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Why V Make FRENDZ?
Coz They Understand Just By Looking In Our Eyes…
Coz U Can Say Sumthing Stupid Or Expose Ur Deepest Secrets To Them…
Coz They Believe In Ur Dreams No Matter How Silly They May Seem..Coz They Luv U For What U Are..
And Finally..
Coz Evrything U Do Together Becomes A Memory šŸ™‚
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USAY ITNA
BATA DENA…!!

Main Us Se Door Ho Kr B,

Bohat Majboor Ho Kr B,

Dukhon Se Choor Ho Kr B,

Usi Ko Yaad Krti Hon,

USAY ITNA
BATA DENA

Main Dukh Apne Chupa Kr B,

Khushi K Geet Ga Kr B,

Hansi Honton Pr Saja Kr B,

Usi Ko Yaad Karti Hon,

USAY ITNA
BATA DENA

Jahan K Ghamon Mein Kho Kr B,

Main DiL K Daagh Dho Kr B,

Kisi K Paas Ho Kr B,
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Wo Aksar Fursat Main Ek Kaam Karte Hain

Bana K Aaina Humain Salam Karte Hain

UsKi Masoom Adaayn Usay Ruswa Na Kr Dain

Wo Likh K Darakhton Pe Mera Naam Aam Karte Hain

Us K Maathay Se Ubharta Hai Subah Ka Noor

Aur Andhere UsKi Zulfon Main Aaram Karte Hain

AanKhon Se Waardatain Karna Hai Paisha UnKa

Dilon Ki Choriaan Wo Sar Ɖ Aam Karte Hain

Zamana Tera Hi TalabGaar Sahi SAGAR

Kuch Hussan Waale Humara Bhi Ehtram Karte Hain,
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Baray Hi Afsos Ki Baat Hy
Pura Din Guzar Gaya Mgr
Jtna Afsos Mjhy Aaj Hua Hy
Main Bs Bata Nhi Skta
Aapny MUJHY WISH TAK NAHI KIA!
AAJ
“SMART” Ppl Day Tha

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Aik larki buhat piyasi thi achanak usay ALA-DIN ka CHIRAGH mila.

Usne usay ragra aur JIN se kaha: Meri piyas bhujao

JIN:
PEPSI wali

Ya
IMRAN HASHMI wali?
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Pathan ki girlfriend ne usko message kya:

“I Miss U”

Bohat dair sochny k baad Pathan ne jawab dya:

“I Student U”
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Sardar writes 2 Bill Gates abt PC & Windows problems:

1. My child learnd MS WORD now he wants MS SENTENCE.

2. I find only
RE-CYCLE BIN but no
RE-MOTORCYCLE BIN

3. I see MS OFFICE but i want to use this softwre @ home so i need MS HOME.

4. Finally, how is dat ur name is GATES but u r selling WINDOWS.
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Pathan 2 doctor: Mujhey 1 problem hay
DR:Kia?

Pathan: Bat karty waqt admi dikhai nahin deta
Dr: Aisa kub hota hay?

Pathan: Phone kartay waqt.
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Maths Teacher Was Teaching Mathematical Conversions

Teacher: If 1000 Kgs = Ton. Then

For 3000 Kgs =How Much?

Santa:
Ton! Ton! Ton!
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Man sees Sardar-G standing in d middle of a huge field of grass & notices,

He is just standing dere, doing nothing, looking @ nothing

Man asks: Sardar-G What r U doing?

Sardar-G: Iā€™m trying 2 win a noble prize

Man: How?

Sardar-G: Well I heard they give d noble prize 2 ppl who r outstanding in their field.
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Funny SMS Forum
Teacher: How Do You Differentiate “WIFE” & “MOTHER”

SARDAR:
Before Marriage We Sleep With “MOTHER”

&

After Marriage
We Sleep With Our “WIFE”
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Pyar krne wale log UFoNE se bat krte ha
Knjus Z0nG se
Amer Jazz se
Khbsurt WARID se
Ziddi TELENOR se
Lekin zaheen log kbhi bat nai krte
Wo mri trha
SMS
karte hain.
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Ek Sardar:
Oye Badmashaa meri paen da dupatta wapis kar de.

Badmash: Chal Oye Chal Tu ki karen ga.

Sardar: Peeko karani se.

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Man:Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kia karte ho?
Sardar:AC k pas ja k beth jata hon

Man:Agar phir bhi garmi lagay to?
Sardar:To A/C on kar laita hon :p
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1 Sardar Police Station K Bahar Se
Guzra Aur Poster Pe Parha

“Wanted For RAPE & MURDER ..”

Sardar Ne Andar Ja Ker Kaha:
“I Want To Apply For This Job”
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Teacher: Story Sunao.

Sardar:1 din hum un k ghar gaye to woh soye howay thay
1 din wo hamare ghar aye to hum soye howa thay.

Moral: Jesa karo gay, waisa bharo gay
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Doctor: Bachey ko paani
dene se pehle boil ker lena chahiye.

Sardar: Lekin Janab, Boil karne se bacha marr tou nahi jaye ga.
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Train me 1 Machchar Chinese ka sir per betha,
Woh usko pakar kar kha gaya!

Phir 1 Machchar Memon k sir par betha,
Usne pakar kar Chinese se pucha:

Khareeday Ga?
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Hum khud pe “GHAROOR” nhi karty.

Kisi ko dosti k liye “MAJBOOR” nhi karty.

Bus apny dil may basa lety hain.

AUR PHIR

Marty dam tak “DOOR” nhi karty!
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Ishq Ka Jis Ko Bhi Khuwab Aajata Hai…
Waqt Samjho Kharab Aajata Hai…

Mehboob Aaye Ya Na Aaye Janaab…
Taaray Gin Gin K Hisaab Aajata Hai…!
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Agr basanti ki mausi thakur ko rakhi bandhy to Veeru & thakur ka kia rishta hua?
.
.
.
.
.
Apna kaam karo Koi rishta nahi banta, Thakur k hath hi nhi thy.

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Kiyon jaagte ho? Kia sochte ho?
Kuch humse kaho, Tanha na raho,

Socha na karo.
Ab raat ki ankhen bheegh chaleen aur CHAND b ha chup jane ko.
Kuch dair mein shabnam aye gi pholon ki piyaas bujhane ko.
Shadaab shagoofon ki soorat khuwabon k nagar mein kho jao
Ab,,,,so jao
Ab,,,,so jao…
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Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower
& Red Light glowing on the top:

Seeing this he said: India is developing fast,
See there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air.
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Sardar: Yaar mujhe 1 Hathora
or keel chahiye computer k lye.

Sales man: Magar computer me inka kia kam?
Sardar:Oye yar mujhe computer mein windows lagani hai.

Apni aaghosh main kisi roz chupa lo mujhko,
Gham-e-Dunya se meri jaan bacha lo mujhko,
Tumko de di hai isharon main ijazat maine,
Mangnay se na milun to chura lo mujheko,
Apne saye se bhi ab to mujhe dar lagta hai,
Ho jo mumkin to nigahon main chupa lo mujhko,
Dil main nakaam tammanaon ka Tufaan sa hai,
Meri uljhan meri wehshat se nikalo mujhko,
Apni aaghosh main kisi roz chupa lo mujhko.

Mujhe apni muhabbat ki khushbu se noor kar do,
Tumse juda na ho sakon itna majboor kar do,
Meri nas nas main bas jaye Wafa teri,
Kisi aur ki taraf na dekhon itna maghroor kar do.

Funny SMS

Meri hasti ki takmeel main shamil hai hissa tera bhi,
Main agar tujh se na milta to adhoora rehta.

Meri zindagi k Raaz main ik Raaz tum bhi ho,
Meri Bandgi ki Pyaas main ik Pyaas tum bhi ho.
Tum kya ho kuch ho ya nahi ho Magar,
Meri Zindagi k Kaash main ik Kaash tum bhi ho.

Bohat door he sahi,
Hamray ghar se,
Tumharay Ghar ka Kinara,
Par hum Hawa k har Jhonkay se,
Poch he letay hain k,
Kya Haal Hai Tumhara.

Mujhse kehti hai tere sath rahon gi sada Wasiq!
Bohat pyar kerti hai mujhse udaasi meri.

Muhabbat k sapnay dekhte bohat hain,
Woh raton main humko jagatay bohat hain,
Main aankhon main kaajal lagaon to kese?
In aankhon ko log rulatay bohat hain.

Yadon ki dhund main aapki parchai si lagti hai,
Kanon main gunjti shehnai si lagti hai,
Aap qareeb ho to apna pan hai,
Warna seenay main saans bhi parai si lagti hai.

Tere khayal ko kabhi dil se juda na karon,
Tere bhaghair to main saans bhi liya na karon,
Jo tu mila to mujhe mashwara diya dil ne,
K ab Khuda se koi aur iltaja na karon.

Jiski talash hai usko pata bhi nahi,
Hamari chahat ko usne kabhi samjha he nahi,
Hum pochte rahe k kya tumhain humse pyar hai?
Woh kehte rahy k us ne suna he nahi.

Bus ik Lamha he guzarta hai teri qurbat main,
Lekin tamam raat woh anjani khushbu nahi jati,
Tere paas aany se kya baton dil ka Haal,
Aik saans aati hai to dosri li jati nahi.

Main her pal tumhara PYAR chahti hon,
Tumhari aankhon main apne liye AITBAAR chahti hon,
Tumara dil dharkay to SIRF mere liye,
Tumhain dekhna apne ishq main BEQARAAR chahti hon,
Main chahti hon k bus main hon aur tum ho,
Her pal teri BANHON main reh kar Muhabbat BESHUMAAR chahti hon,
Jis tarah meri har Soch, her Dharkan, her Nazar main TUM ho,
Wese he teri her Saans main BASERA chahti hon,
Such Main.

Ramzan Day SMS

Packing start kar do phir nahi bolna k bataya nahi,

Abhi 6 ya 7 din hain,

Ramzan ka chand nazar aatay he aapko 1 month k liye band kar diya jayega.
Ramadan SMS


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