Unique Funny SMS in Urdu, Hindi and English

Archive for the ‘urdu funny sms’ Category

Yoga teacher to a woman: Has yoga any effect over your husband’s drinking habit?

Woman: Yes, an amazing funny effect! Now he drinks the whole bottle standing upside down over his head.

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Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya?

Banta: Maine kaha salon Ek-Ek karke aao.
Santa: Phir?

Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta!

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Pathan’s Friend: What is call girl?

Pathan: Khocha jab ap kisi ko call karta hai, Tab ek larki call per bolti hai k aap ka blnce na kafi hai, us ko call girl bolte hain.

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SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY
Dont get confused, Aray Baba SORRY means:

S->Some,
O->One Is,
R->Really,
R->Remembering
Y->You..

Have A wonderful day!

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Dard dene waale bahut milte hai,
Magar dard lene waale kam milte hai,
Nazuk waqt me hume zarur yaad karna,
Kyuki zindagi me chahne waale bahut kam milte hai.

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I can’t find a reason why Life Introduced Me to You..

But that’s not the question.

Question is: How life knew that I needed a lovely one like you???

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Yaaden Aansu hoti to chalak jati,
Yaaden likhawat hoti to padhi jati,
Yaaden to zindgi me basa wo ehsas hai,
Jo lakh kosiso ke baad bhi lafzo me nahi simat pati..

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1 Bacha ek ghar ki bell bajane ki koshish kr raha tha:

1 Baba G ne dekha to us k pas ja k Bell beja di or pocha beta or koi kam ho to btao.

Bacha: Baba nass hun.

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Inspector to Banta: Phaansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai?

Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..

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BOY 2 girl: Tu hi to Jannat meri,
Tu hi mera junon or kuach na janu me,
Bas itna hi janu,
Tujme RAB dikhta hai YARA me kya kru.

Girl: Mattha tek or Dafaa ho.

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Aap Humko Achy lagty Ho,
Door jaty ho jitna utna Dil k Qareeb lagty ho,
Meri Qismat main tum nahi lekin,
Phir bhi mujhko Apna Naseeb Kyon Lagty ho?

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Koi Pal Bina Tumhary,
Bhala Kese Beet Jaye.

Mere Paas tum nahi ho,
Meri Yaad k nagar Main.

Mere Khuab k Safar main,
Meri Soch ki Tahon Main,

Meri aankh k Bhanwar main
Bas Aarzu Tumhari,

Is Aarzu se aagy,
Koi Raasta Nahi hai,

Tumhain Kis Qadar hai Chaha
Ye Tumhain Pata nahi Hai.

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Aik sardar Europe gaya wahan us ko police ne roka aur investigation start kar di..

Sardar ko English nai aati thi..

Us ne Sick Leave ki Application suna di.

Police ne use Pagal samajh k chor dia..

Wife: Wah sardar jee tusi te great o.

Sardar: O A tey kuch vi nai Hale te may Thirsty Crow nai sunai..

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Aaj ksi ne mjhe phon kya
Aur
AaP k barey me kuch btya
Me us ka naam to nhi bta skta
Per
Wo aap k barey me keh raha tha k aap

* some text missing *

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Funny Messages

Wife husbnd se: Aji! agar me gum ho gai to tum kya karoge?

Husbnd:Its the time 2 disco,

 <('.')
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 _/"\_

Kon dhondega tjhko,,
Kabhi na milay tu mujhko.

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Faqeer to Sardar: Aap k parrosi ne mujhey pait bhar kr khana khilaya hai, Aap bhi mujhe kuch de dein..

Sardar: Ye lo HAJMOLA…

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Hum Ne Unko Miss Call de kar Apni Yaad Dilai Thi FARAZ!
.
.
.
Unhon Ne Msg kar k kaha.
.
.
.
Keera Hai kya?

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Mere mehbob ki hoshiyari to dekho Faraz,

Ramzan Mubarak main kehti hai aao Lunch pr chalen.

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Utho Utho School Bus aa gai,
Ye keh kr unho ne jaga dya Faraz,

.
Aur ek hum nadan jin ko baad main yaad aya Summer Vacation hai.

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Pathan ne Major Rohail ko dawat pr bulaya
Major Rohail khana dekh kr bhag gya
Kyu?

Khana:
Naswar Pulao
Naswar Karahi

Sweet Dish:
Naswar Halwa

Drink:
Naswar Cola

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Pathan: Khocha Budget 2009/2010 bohat acha hai
hum bohat khush hai budget se.

.
Major Rohail: Kyu?

Pathan: Oy yaara…
NASWAR par TAX jo nahi laga.

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Bush to Obama: Main ne tum se kaha ta k ye Pathan Dashatghard Hain.

Obama: Kyun?

Bush: Deka nahi k teen pathano
ne Gharib Sri lanka team se world cup cheen liya.

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Memon K Ghar Se Choontiyan Ja Rahen Thin…
.
.
Memon: Kahan Ja Rahi Ho ?
.
.
Choonti: Bhai Bhooka Marnay Se T0 Behtar Hai Hijrat Kar Jaeyn.

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JUDGE to PATHAN: Tumhara juram sabit ho chuka hai, Kal tumhain phansi pe latkaya jae ga..
.
.
.
PATHAN: Woh to theek hai lekin Utara kab jae ga?

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APPLE Juice
MANGO Juice
TARBUZ Juice
BADAM Juice
KHAJOOR Juice
BANANA Juice

Agr in mein se kuch nahi pasand to,

ANGOOTHA Chooooos.
Kanjoos.

Sms karta he nahi.

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Mere mehbob ne kaha aaj hum tumhare pyar ki intaha dekhna chahte hai Faraz,

Ye keh kar unho ne apna Summer Vacation ka kaam mere hath main thama dya.

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Pathan: Mujhe to ankhain band karny par bhi dikhai deta hai.

Friend: Acha! Kya dikhai daita hay?
.
.
.
.
Pathan: ANDHERA!

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Bivi Par Hukoomat Karne Wale Begherat Hote Hain,

Asal Mard Wo Hai Jo Bivi Ko Marwa Kar Hukoomat Karta Hai… ;->

Asif Zardari

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Sheikh ki BV rorahi thi:

Kisi ne pucha k q rorahi ho?

Usne kaha k mujse DETOL gir gaya tha
or sheikh sb ne meri ungli kaat k usi DETOL
main dibo de takay DETOL zaya na ho.

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Ek larka cinema mei film dekhne gya..
Sath wali seat pe ek bari bi beth gæin.
Unk pass 7UP ki bottle thi..
Wo film k doraan hr 10 minute pr ek sip leti..
2 hours bad larke ne unki bottle li or ek he saans mei khali kr k bola,
“Aapse khatm nahi ho rhi thi, isliye meine krdi”
Is per Bari bee boli…

“Main to is mei PAAN thook rahi thi”

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Friend 2 Sheikh:
Mujhe apni ring de do main ring ko
dekh k tumhay yaad karu ga

Sheikh:
Tum ye soch k muje yaad kr lena
k mene ring mangi thi or usne nahi di.

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Agar Spiderman PAKISTAN mai banti
to us ka nam kya hota?

Zara socho

.

.

.

Phr socho

“JAALAY wala GUJJAR”

Police wala: Main ne tumhen hath dya tha, To tum rukey kyu nahi?

Sardar Driver: O G main samja k aap mujhe Salam kar rahe hai.

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Sardar aur Major Rohail ki khob pitai hue:

Dono Birthday Party me muft ka khana khaty huay pakray gaye or kehne lagay,
.

.
“Hum larki walo ki taraf se hain”.

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Itni mehngai main bhi ek kaam roz roz hota hai Faraz

Dhooz Dhooz Dhaaz Dhaaz – Bomb Dhamaka.

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Phatan: Aaj mene Rs.5000 ka Easyload krvaya, aur sab dosto/family ko SMS kr dye.

Major Rohail: Kyu?

Phatan: O G sunna hy ab SMS per 20 pyse Tax lagne wala hy.

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Tu ne kabhi kisi ko SMS nhi kya.
Mene tujhe itna shrminda kya phir b tu ne kabhi SMS nhi kya!
Ab to SMS kar do
ya
TAX lagne ka intazar kr rahe ho.

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Sardar: Mene kal easy load waly ko bewakoof banaya!

Major Rohail: Woh kese?

Sardar: Hum ne usko 100 Rupey dya or number galat likhwa diya…

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Bubbli: Uncle Uncle Choor, Daku ur Jail yafta mujrimon per TAX kyu nhi lagta?

Zardari: Beta phir to sab k sab MNA, MPA aur Govt mulazammen ko TAX net me lana pere ga.

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Santa meets his friend Bunta!

Santa: A B, A B, A B, A B, A B…!
Banta: Oye, Iska Matlab?

Santa: Kuch Nahin Yaar, I Mean Long Time No C..!

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Aazmaish rishton main zaroor hoti hai,
Na mil pana kisi ki majboori hoti hai,

Yaad to door se bhi kar sakty hain,
Par Dil ki hasrat to mil kar he poori hoti hai.

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Bharosay ki ek jorri hai DOSTI,
Betaab Dil ki Majboori hai DOSTI,
Na mano to kuch nahi hai ye DOSTI,
Aur mano to Insaan ki kamzori hai DOSTI.

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Friend and Blood have only one difference…

Blood enters in Heart and Flow out,,,

But

Friend enters in Heart and Stay inside forever.

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Santa: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?

Jasmeet: I clean the toilet bowl.
Santa: How does that help?

Jasmeet: I use your toothbrush!

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Wo konsa janwar hai jis k sir par 50 saal k bad baal nikalty hen or us ka moun aisa he jesy pighli hui mombti?

.
.
.
.

Bata dun?
.

Nawaz Sharif!!

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Today Is World Red Rose Night.
If U Love My Friendship or with my relation Give 1 Missed Call
And Send This 2 Al Ur Friend
N See How Many Missed Call U Get

Today Is World Red Rose Night.

If U Love My Friendship or with my relation Give 1 Missed Call

And Send This 2 Al Ur Friend

N See How Many Missed Call U Get.

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I think I’m Disturbing you, Sorry!

This is my Last Msg and
I will not Msg you any more.
Good Bye.

Never Expect that From Me.

I’m Born to Disturb You.

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Lady: So, you want to become my son-in-law?

Boy: Not really, but I don’t see any other way 2 merry your daughter!

Here I would like to share a collection of smile sms smile quotes which makes me smile and bring beautilful smile on your face (SMS Messages in this category are in roman urdu, hindi and english).

In short these messages are termed as SMS4Smile

:-):-)
:-):-):-)
:-):-):-):-)
🙂 🙂
:-):-):-):-)
:-):-):-)
:-):-)

For You,

One For Each Hour.!
So ThaT You Keep SMiLiNG 24 HOURS

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Smile For The Ones You Love…
A Simple Smile Is All It Takes To Make One Happy…
Love Can Come In Many Different Ways, Shapes n Sizes …
But A Simple Smile Will Conquer Everything …
And Leave The Best Of Us Speechless …
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A caring person doesn’t call & speak;
He makes it with a simple sms!
Bcz, sms is not what the mouth speaks;
Its what the heart really feels!
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Keep the smile,
Leave the tear,
Think of joy,
Forget the fear ,
Hold the laugh,
Leave the pain,
Be jouyous till i sms again
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Heart Can Skip Beats 4 a While
Memories can be kept in a file
A desert can replace the Nile
But…
NOthing can stop a smile when ur name appears on my mobile.
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Smile a while,
& when U smile,
smile another smile
& soon there will b miles
& miles of smile
bcoz you smiled .
i wish your day is full of SMILE
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Match Stick Glows 4 Few Seconds

Candle 4 An Hour
Sun 4 A Day

But A Smile Can Glow Ur Life 4 EVER
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hey dear if u hve time

if u dont mind

if ur mode is alright

them plz leave all ur works

and

and

and

1 smile smille and smile!!!!!
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U knw wht makes me happy whn u msg me?
.
.
.
ur joke?
.
.
.
no
.
.
.
graphics?
.
.
.
no
.
.
.
sweet msg?
.
.
.
no
.
.
jst ur name
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smiling is cooling System of heart,
Sparking system of eyes,
Lightning system of face,
So Keep smiling……………..
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SMS
Smile a while,
While u smile,
smile another smile,
soon there will be miles,
and miles of smiles is just u smile,
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Hey someting missing in u.
Bt what & where?
Let’s search..
In ur bag.
NO,
In ur pocket .
NO,
Oh GOD .
I got it !!
It’s on ur face
UR SWEET SMILE
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A HEARTFUL SMILE gives joy to you .BUT
AN ARTIFICIAL SMILE makes you guilty.
so always smile heartfully.
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S: Sets u free

M: Makes u special

I: Increases your face value

L: Lift up your spirits

E: Erase all your tension and stress…

So SmiLe=)

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Keep the smile,
Leave the tear,
Think of joy,
Forget the fear ,
Hold the laugh,
Leave the pain,
Be jouyous till i sms again
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Doctors prescription 4 u…
A cute little smile 4 breakfast,
More laughs 4 lunch,
And lots of happiness 4 dinner…
Doctor’s fees?
A SMS whenever u r free
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Girls misuse it! models sell it! photograhers cage it!doctors advice it!death freezes it! artists create it! tats SMILE! KEEP SMILING!!
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You Can Hide Alot …
Behind A SMILE

A
B r o k e n
H e a r t

S h a t t e r e d
D r e a m s

L o n g i n g
D e s i r e s …
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Shakespear said don’t worry!
because if u r worried u get a wrinkle,
So why don’t u smile & get a dimple.
Always smile and be happy

Funny SMS

JUSTICE ki bahali
JUSTICE ki bahali
ka irada to nhi tha
Zardari…

Lekin Sheerin ki
Bewafai ne
majboor kar diya.

———————————————-

Arz Kia Hai…
Arz Kia Hai…

Those Who Know Me Know Me Well

Waah Waah

Those Who Know Me Know Me Well

Those Who Do Not, Go To Hell . . .

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English Shairy Mulahiza ho
English Shairy Mulahiza ho!

Arz kya hai…

She is Kissing,

Wah Wah

She is Kissing,

* Some Text Missing *
* Some Text Missing *

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Akhbar aur Radio
Teacher: Akhbar aur Radio main kya Faraq hai?

Pathan: Akhbar main Rotiyan lapait saktay hain, par Radio main nahi.

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Bruce Lee’s Favorite
Bruce Lee’s Favorite

Vegetable=Mu-Lee
Festival=Diwa-Lee
Actres=Sona-Lee
Music=Qawa-Lee
Film=Coo-Lee
Animal=Bil-Lee
Brain=Urs
Why?

Kha-Lee

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SMS main Zaleel karna
Funny SMS main Zaleel karna ab bund bhi karo FARAZ!!!!

Kya “Wasi” aur “Ghalib” Tumhari Phuphi k larkay hain?

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Yeh keh kar woh
Yeh keh kar woh meri sari 7up pi gaya FARAZ

.
.
.
.
.
“K TO MERI ADHURI PYAS PYAS TO AGAI MAN KO RAS RAS”

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Pathan ne bank se
Pathan ne bank se car li
Lekin loan wapis nahi kar saka,

Bank waley car ley gaye,
Pathan: Pehley pata hota to
Shadi bhi bank se loan le kar karta.

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Hum Har Roz Udaas
Hum Har Roz Udaas Hotay Hain Aur
Sham Guzar Jati Hy

Kisi Roz Sham Udaas Ho Gi Aur
Hum Guzar Jayein Ge.

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Paper Se Pehle Ki DUA
Paper Se Pehle Ki
“DUA”

.
.
.
.
.
.

Aye Khuda!!
Is Baar Pass
Kara De
Next Time
Zaruur Parhoonga … 😉

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SANIA MIRZA Se Baat
Santa: Mene Kal SANIA MIRZA Se Phone Pe Baat Ki.

Banta: That’s Great Yaar… Usne Kya Kahaa?

Santa: Usne Kaha WRONG NUMBER.

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If you are in tension
If you are in tension,
If nothing seems right,
If u find no way out,
Then just think of me only once,
I will be always there to INCREASE your tensions.

———————————————-

Pehle kahan milte the
Yaad hai ham pehle kahan milte the.

Train ruki,
Khidki khuli,
Nazro se nazre mili,
Aur aapne kaha…

KHUDA K NAAM PE KUCH DE DE BABA!!!

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In larkion se dil lagana
In larkion se dil lagana ek bhool hai

In k peeche itna bhagna fazool hai

Jis din kisi larki ne keh diya “I LOVE U”

Tou samajh jana us din APRIL FOOL hai.

———————————————-

Tmhari 1 bat pata Lgi hai
Tmhari 1 bat pata Lgi hai, zara free ho ker msg karna Ok.

Sab ko frwd kro,dekhna kitne log pura msg nhi padhte hain.

———————————————-

03321″r”a.Z<J
503321″r”a.Z<J
N\z
A””xa%E
GdX|”r”a.*@$H #neycKC7&A8S”3!,}
HS E:lP1R#h4`
)k6|,`c&/?\D”r”R”7pq”qPK#Zm
,cV @ )Jfll LDv4ky.aLDRMhq.

Kia par Rahay ho?

Mein to April Fool Bana raha tha..:)

———————————————-

1st APRIL ko ULLU banao
1st APRIL ko logon ko uloo banane ke 7 tarike:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Ye tha pehla tarika baki Baad main.

Har aahat pe jan
Har aahat pe jan nikal jati hai Faraz.

Ye Public Toilet me kundi kyon Nahi hoti??????

Real Fact Of D Millenium
Real Fact Of The Millennium.

Whenever U Throw A Stone In The Streets Of Lahore Or Karachi,

It’ll Surely Hit..

A Dog

Or

AN ENGINEER.

A boy going in car
A boy going in car.
Suddenly he saw a girl lying in the middle of road. He came out and..

To be continued..
To listen the full story plz snd 50 easy load ;->

Baray zalim hain
Baray zalim hain is sheher k log Faraz!!!
.
.
.
.
.
.

Sim Badal k kehtay hain Batao hum Kon hain ? 😀

A Great Loser
Definition of “A great loser”:

A person who dials a number
(written with lipstick on a phone booth)
and…

.

.

.

His wife picks up the phone…

Suno
Aj mere pass

Mobile hy

Charger Hy

SIM hy

Battery Hy

Tumhare pass kya hy?
Khali Inbox?
Agr nhi to
SMS he send kr do yaar.

W & Women
You know why Women starts with “W”

Because all Questions start with “W”

Who?
Why?
What?
When?
Which?
Whom?
Where?

Wife..?

A Lot Of Fellows
Fact …
A Lot Of Fellows Now A Dayz Have

B.A
B.B.A
M.B.A
B.E
B.S
Or
Ph.D

Unfortunately
They Don’t Have A
J.O.B … ;->

Oy TEREEE TU
OY!
Teri
Teri
Teri
Teri to
Teri to
Teri to
.
.
bohat yaad aa rhe hai
koi SMS he kr do.

J 13 Khayal 20 na aaway
J 13 Khayal 20 na aaway,
80 udaas ho jaandy aan,
Tay 100 v nai sakday,
Chalo aih 10 diyo,
K tusi 20 saanu inna e yaad karday o?
ya rooz 32 band kar k 100 janday o..

J 13 Khayal 20 na aaway
J 13 Khayal 20 na aaway,
80 udaas ho jaandy aan,
Tay 100 v nai sakday,
Chalo aih 10 diyo,
K tusi 20 saanu inna e yaad karday o?
ya rooz 32 band kar k 100 janday o..

Any body can love
dAny body can love a Rose
But it takes a great deal to love a leaf.
Dont love some one who is beautiful,
But love the who can make u r life beautiful…

April Fool SMS

SATHIYAA. . . . .
SATHIYAA. . . . .

* some text missing *

Breaking News “Pakistan Zindabad”
Mulk ki halat ki wajah se ye Nara Tabdeel kar diya gaya hai.
Naya Nara hai.

*

*

*
Pakistan se Zinda Bhag
Funny SMS
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Please aap kisi ko gaali na den, is se aap k gunah barhtay hain,
Kisi ko bura bhala kehna ho to usay PARVAIZ MUSHARRAF keh den, woh khud he sharminda ho jayega.
Shukriya.
Send Me SMS
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Tip of the Day
Kabhi ye mat socho tumhari girl friend ne tumhain kitna Romantic SMS bheja hai.
Hamesha ye socho usay kisne bheja hai?

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Usay Taraash k heera to bana diya hum ne Faraz
Magar ab ye sochte hain usay khareeden kaise?

Yehi soch kar uski har baat ko sach mana hai Faraz,
K itnay khubsoorat lub jhoot kese bolen gay?
Ramadan SMS
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Forward this msg to 10 peoples
&
You will get nothing!!!

Its true.
Its working.

Even I didnt get anything!!!
Except a Lovely Smile on your Face.
Girls Mobile Numbers
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

1 Baat batao please.
Isko mazaaq main mat taal dena.
Gol Mol jawab nahi chalega.
Dekho kuch baten Zindagi main bohat Ehem hoti hain.
Such batao.

LIGHT HAI?


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