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Best Collection of New Adult SMS Jokes

Posted on: May 26, 2009


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Santa raat ko sharab k nashe main Ghar aya:

Us ne apni BV ko Banta K sath sex karte dekh lya

Aftr much thinking Santa bola
.
.
.
“Oh sorry main Samjha mera ghar hy”
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Santa: Mere BV Zero meter hai.

Banta: Tujhe kese pta?

Santa: Shadi se pehle 4 logo ne check kr k muje Batya tha.
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Height of positive attitude:

Girl Friend: Mera Rishta aaya hy aur
shadi hone wali hy.

Boy Friend: That’s Good,

Phir to hum Condom k Bagher sex ker sken ge.
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Medical science proved k
Kapre tight pehn’ney se Blood Circulation ruk jati hy.

But

Larkiyo k kapre jitne tight hon.

Larko ke blood circulation utni tez hoti hy.
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Advise to all the girls….

Do not play with street dogs u may get rabies…

And..

Do not play with smart boys u may get babies..
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Girl to boy: Shaadi k liye konsi date rakhien?

Boy: 22 December

Girl: Koi khaas wajah?

Boy: haan, Saal ki sabse lambi raat isi date ko hoti hai..
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Women to Dentist:

“Its so painful I’ll prefer to get Pregnant than getting my Cavity Filled.”

Dentist:

“Make a Decision, I’ll adjust the Chair Accordingly.” 🙂
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Boy: Men dress up to been seen by others.

Girl: Laughs and says girls dress down to be seen by others.
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Teacher to Pappu, Isko English main Translate karo:

Sara ne Kapray Pehan liye hain.

Pappu: Shit! I’m Late.
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Santa on Long tour asks Banta to inform if anything unusual happens at home.

Banta SMS after a month: Man who comes to Screw UR Wife daily, did not come today.
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Toilet songs:

In case of loose motion:
“ruk ruk ruk arey baba ruk”

In case of Kabz:
“na tu ay gee na hee chain ay ga”

In case of Gas Trouble:
“hawa hawa aae hawa khusbho luta dai”

After coming out of toilet:
“juda hokay bhee tu mujh may kaheen baki hai”
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Teacher to student: Aap bary ho ya aap k papa?

Student: Mein

Teacher: Wo Kaise?

Student: Mene mama k pass sona chor dia hai, Papa abhi tak sotay hain..
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Kaun kaheta hai Akele aaye they..
Akele jayenge..

Arrey, Bina do ke koi aa nahin sakta..

Aur, Bina chaar ke koi jaa nahin sakta…
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Girl 2 Mom: Mom I have started loving a Boy!

Mom angry: What?? How old is he? What does he do?

Girl: He is 3 months old. Happily kicking in my stomach. 😛
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Super hit insult..
Wife: Agar dunia sirf 30 mint main khatam ho rahi ho
tu tum kia chaho gay?
Husband: Off course Sex
Or baki k 29 Minutes?
English Message:
Super Hit Insult
Wife: If a world is about to end in 30 mints what will you do?
Husband: Off course sex
Wife: Or 29 remaining minutes?
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Class mein shor ho raha tha teacher nahi tha,

Principal entered in class an asked angrily:

Kis ka period chal raha hai?

4 larkian sharmatay hue:
Sir Hamara
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Dhobi police se: Banta ne meri biwi ki Ijjat lut li!!

Banta: Main press karwane gaya tha,

Dhobi ne kaha main Khana kha raha hoon,

Istri garam hai, Maar lo!
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Santa: In all AIDS ads, they talk of SAFE SEX.

What is SAFE SEX?
Banta: Oye, SAFE SEX is when wife is out of town!
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Dil K Mareez mutvja ho
Jin Hazrat ko Valentine day
Pr mayusi ka samna krna
Pra wo hmara Poond Capsul
Estamal kre
.
Bachya aap k qadmon me
Mayusi na hon
Sunday Open.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

Ek ladki ki T-shirt pe likha tha? 102 Hum FM?

To batao uski pant par kya likha hoga?

Bajate raho.
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Boy During Sex: Q na hum shadi kar len,
Phir hum roz aisa kar saken gay.

Girl: Mazdur ho Mazduri karo,
Factory k Maalik bannay ki koshish na karo.

Happy Mazdoor Day.

12 Responses to "Best Collection of New Adult SMS Jokes"

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