Archive for July 2009
Urdu, Hindi and English Funny SMS Messages and Jokes of the Month
Posted by: uniquefunnysms on: July 14, 2009
Yoga teacher to a woman: Has yoga any effect over your husband’s drinking habit?
Woman: Yes, an amazing funny effect! Now he drinks the whole bottle standing upside down over his head.
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Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta.
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya?
Banta: Maine kaha salon Ek-Ek karke aao.
Santa: Phir?
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta!
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Pathan’s Friend: What is call girl?
Pathan: Khocha jab ap kisi ko call karta hai, Tab ek larki call per bolti hai k aap ka blnce na kafi hai, us ko call girl bolte hain.
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SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY
Dont get confused, Aray Baba SORRY means:
S->Some,
O->One Is,
R->Really,
R->Remembering
Y->You..
Have A wonderful day!
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Dard dene waale bahut milte hai,
Magar dard lene waale kam milte hai,
Nazuk waqt me hume zarur yaad karna,
Kyuki zindagi me chahne waale bahut kam milte hai.
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I can’t find a reason why Life Introduced Me to You..
But that’s not the question.
Question is: How life knew that I needed a lovely one like you???
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Yaaden Aansu hoti to chalak jati,
Yaaden likhawat hoti to padhi jati,
Yaaden to zindgi me basa wo ehsas hai,
Jo lakh kosiso ke baad bhi lafzo me nahi simat pati..
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1 Bacha ek ghar ki bell bajane ki koshish kr raha tha:
1 Baba G ne dekha to us k pas ja k Bell beja di or pocha beta or koi kam ho to btao.
Bacha: Baba nass hun.
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Inspector to Banta: Phaansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai?
Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..
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BOY 2 girl: Tu hi to Jannat meri,
Tu hi mera junon or kuach na janu me,
Bas itna hi janu,
Tujme RAB dikhta hai YARA me kya kru.
Girl: Mattha tek or Dafaa ho.
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Aap Humko Achy lagty Ho,
Door jaty ho jitna utna Dil k Qareeb lagty ho,
Meri Qismat main tum nahi lekin,
Phir bhi mujhko Apna Naseeb Kyon Lagty ho?
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Koi Pal Bina Tumhary,
Bhala Kese Beet Jaye.
Mere Paas tum nahi ho,
Meri Yaad k nagar Main.
Mere Khuab k Safar main,
Meri Soch ki Tahon Main,
Meri aankh k Bhanwar main
Bas Aarzu Tumhari,
Is Aarzu se aagy,
Koi Raasta Nahi hai,
Tumhain Kis Qadar hai Chaha
Ye Tumhain Pata nahi Hai.
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Aik sardar Europe gaya wahan us ko police ne roka aur investigation start kar di..
Sardar ko English nai aati thi..
Us ne Sick Leave ki Application suna di.
Police ne use Pagal samajh k chor dia..
Wife: Wah sardar jee tusi te great o.
Sardar: O A tey kuch vi nai Hale te may Thirsty Crow nai sunai..
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Aaj ksi ne mjhe phon kya
Aur
AaP k barey me kuch btya
Me us ka naam to nhi bta skta
Per
Wo aap k barey me keh raha tha k aap
* some text missing *
Funny SMS of the Month – July 2009
Posted by: uniquefunnysms on: July 6, 2009
Wife husbnd se: Aji! agar me gum ho gai to tum kya karoge?
Husbnd:Its the time 2 disco,
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Kon dhondega tjhko,,
Kabhi na milay tu mujhko.
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Faqeer to Sardar: Aap k parrosi ne mujhey pait bhar kr khana khilaya hai, Aap bhi mujhe kuch de dein..
Sardar: Ye lo HAJMOLA…
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Hum Ne Unko Miss Call de kar Apni Yaad Dilai Thi FARAZ!
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Unhon Ne Msg kar k kaha.
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Keera Hai kya?
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Mere mehbob ki hoshiyari to dekho Faraz,
Ramzan Mubarak main kehti hai aao Lunch pr chalen.
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Utho Utho School Bus aa gai,
Ye keh kr unho ne jaga dya Faraz,
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Aur ek hum nadan jin ko baad main yaad aya Summer Vacation hai.
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Pathan ne Major Rohail ko dawat pr bulaya
Major Rohail khana dekh kr bhag gya
Kyu?
Khana:
Naswar Pulao
Naswar Karahi
Sweet Dish:
Naswar Halwa
Drink:
Naswar Cola
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Pathan: Khocha Budget 2009/2010 bohat acha hai
hum bohat khush hai budget se.
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Major Rohail: Kyu?
Pathan: Oy yaara…
NASWAR par TAX jo nahi laga.
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Bush to Obama: Main ne tum se kaha ta k ye Pathan Dashatghard Hain.
Obama: Kyun?
Bush: Deka nahi k teen pathano
ne Gharib Sri lanka team se world cup cheen liya.
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Memon K Ghar Se Choontiyan Ja Rahen Thin…
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Memon: Kahan Ja Rahi Ho ?
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Choonti: Bhai Bhooka Marnay Se T0 Behtar Hai Hijrat Kar Jaeyn.
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JUDGE to PATHAN: Tumhara juram sabit ho chuka hai, Kal tumhain phansi pe latkaya jae ga..
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PATHAN: Woh to theek hai lekin Utara kab jae ga?
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APPLE Juice
MANGO Juice
TARBUZ Juice
BADAM Juice
KHAJOOR Juice
BANANA Juice
Agr in mein se kuch nahi pasand to,
ANGOOTHA Chooooos.
Kanjoos.
Sms karta he nahi.
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Mere mehbob ne kaha aaj hum tumhare pyar ki intaha dekhna chahte hai Faraz,
Ye keh kar unho ne apna Summer Vacation ka kaam mere hath main thama dya.
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Pathan: Mujhe to ankhain band karny par bhi dikhai deta hai.
Friend: Acha! Kya dikhai daita hay?
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Pathan: ANDHERA!
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Bivi Par Hukoomat Karne Wale Begherat Hote Hain,
Asal Mard Wo Hai Jo Bivi Ko Marwa Kar Hukoomat Karta Hai… ;->
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Sheikh ki BV rorahi thi:
Kisi ne pucha k q rorahi ho?
Usne kaha k mujse DETOL gir gaya tha
or sheikh sb ne meri ungli kaat k usi DETOL
main dibo de takay DETOL zaya na ho.
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Ek larka cinema mei film dekhne gya..
Sath wali seat pe ek bari bi beth gæin.
Unk pass 7UP ki bottle thi..
Wo film k doraan hr 10 minute pr ek sip leti..
2 hours bad larke ne unki bottle li or ek he saans mei khali kr k bola,
“Aapse khatm nahi ho rhi thi, isliye meine krdi”
Is per Bari bee boli…
“Main to is mei PAAN thook rahi thi”
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Friend 2 Sheikh:
Mujhe apni ring de do main ring ko
dekh k tumhay yaad karu ga
Sheikh:
Tum ye soch k muje yaad kr lena
k mene ring mangi thi or usne nahi di.
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Agar Spiderman PAKISTAN mai banti
to us ka nam kya hota?
Zara socho
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Phr socho
“JAALAY wala GUJJAR”
Unique Funny SMS in Urdu, Hindi and English 